Rolling stone gathers more moolah

May 11, 2011

People regularly take things for granted. Especially things which are not going anywhere . Companies take employees for granted , especially loyal employees . It is the employees who are trying to  jump  boat who get the most attention . They get the best hikes and offers from the company in a bid to keep them . The loyal employee gets praise and little else .

A person who is looking for other opportunities is not termed a traitor but is marked  ambitious . Someone who is looking for other jobs is usually keeping himself up to date . He knows his true value in the job market and can confidently negotiate his paycheck . While the employee who is loyal to the organization , has most probably settled himself in a rut . He can do his work competently but is afraid of change in work or work environment .

The above is not absolutely true . But it is how most employers views the employees . When he/she  has to compete for the employee’s attention with other similar organizations is when the employer  realizes the worth of that employee . Of course not all organizations necessarily follow this . There are many excellent companies which look after their employees so well that they need not look for other opportunities .

The same holds for relationships . We have seen people who are absolutely devoted in their relationships . Then when it breaks they are shell shocked . How did this happen , what did I do wrong ? . Actually he/she did no wrong only too much right . So devoted are they that the other person takes them for granted and might even get bored . A little bit of jealousy is good for any relationship . It is only when you fear loosing something you realize its value . And keep effort not to loose it .

So advice to readers , keep looking for opportunities in jobs or relationships , but look before you jump . Some steps cannot be reverted back .

Relationships and faults

May 3, 2011


People get into relationships all the time attracted by appearance , nature , qualities of the other person, loneliness . Relationships break  for  the same reasons of appearance,nature,quality and faults  of the other person.

Everyone has faults . Someone might have too much pride, might never apologize for mistakes ,  others might have difficulty in expressing their feelings .   There are some  critical faults and not so critical faults . Critical faults are beyond reconciliation like cheating on a partner is .

People searching for perfection / the perfect mate will never find one . Initially blinded by the glow of a new relation , people feel they have their perfect partner . As  time goes and the gloss comes off  the faults appear . Then comes  the period in which partners  acknowledge each others faults and learn to live with it .  A period might also come  in  which they can no longer live with the other person’ faults .

So a relation starts breaking .Quarrels occur . Reconciliations occur . Sometimes they don’t occur as pride comes in the way . Each person feels the other is at fault and should be the one who apologizes and moves  the relation back on track .

In a successful relation  people learn to live with the partner’s faults . Someone adjusts or both adjust . Not only do they live with the partner’s faults but they try actively to minimize their own faults . Sometimes the faults are irreconcilable  for people  . Sometimes they do learn to forgive

Whatever be  one’s faults the skill of admitting mistakes and saying sorry is something which everyone should learn .It is the basic pillar of any relationship .Saying sorry , admitting one’s fault seems to be the hardest thing for some people. They will argue and argue , but never accept that they might have done some mistake , have faults in them.

This skill is essential not only in romantic relationships but also in dealing with friendships , workplace , relatives and any other .

realtionship broken